Understand the three terms
A headstone generally stands upright. A marker may be set at ground level or used for a niche containing cremated remains. The exact form available depends on the burial setting and the applicable VA rules. A medallion is a separate emblem attached to a permanent private marker; it does not replace that marker.
The choice is therefore partly about the place of burial. Before completing an application, establish whether the grave is in a national, state, tribal, military, or private cemetery and whether it already has a permanent marker. Describe the actual circumstances rather than selecting an item simply because its name sounds familiar.
Eligibility for a headstone or marker
VA’s headstone and marker guidance explains the requirements for veterans, active-duty service members, National Guard members, reservists, and certain family members. Character of discharge, service dates, length or type of service, and burial circumstances can affect eligibility. The rules include distinctions between an unmarked grave and a grave with a privately purchased marker.
Family eligibility also depends on the cemetery setting. A spouse or dependent child buried in an eligible government or veterans cemetery may qualify. VA states that spouses and dependent children buried in a private cemetery do not qualify for their own government headstone or marker, though an inscription on the veteran’s marker may be possible. This is a reason to check the specific benefit instead of assuming that one approval covers everyone.
When records are incomplete, the appropriate question is what evidence VA will accept. An old uniform, a family recollection, or membership in a veterans group may help someone locate records, but those items should not be treated as a substitute for an eligibility decision.
When a medallion may fit
VA’s medallion guidance describes a benefit for eligible veterans and service members who are buried in a private cemetery and have a permanent, privately purchased headstone or marker. Requirements include the applicable character of discharge and service criteria. The cemetery must approve the medallion’s size.
A medallion can recognize service where a family marker already exists, but approval should come before any alteration to the stone. The cemetery’s representative reviews and signs the application. It is useful to clarify who will receive the item and who will arrange attachment, so that delivery does not leave the next step uncertain.
Government memorial items are not interchangeable in every circumstance. If another item has already been provided, or if the family is considering a different VA memorial option, describe that to VA before applying. The agency can explain whether the requested combination is permitted.
Documents and the application
The standard government headstone or marker application is VA Form 40-1330. The medallion application is VA Form 40-1330M. Current versions and submission instructions are available through the VA guidance linked on this page. Using the appropriate form matters because the cemetery and applicant provide different information for different requests.
VA’s headstone instructions call for a copy of the DD214 or other discharge documents when applying by mail and advise against sending original records. Medallion guidance lists several types of acceptable service evidence and explains what to do when it is unavailable. An applicant should keep a copy of the completed request and the documents that accompanied it.
Check the wording and practical details
Before submission, check the spelling, service information, and other proposed inscription details against the records. It can help to have another trusted person read the form independently. Ask which wording and symbols are permitted, how much space is available, and whether the cemetery requires a particular style.
Also establish what is covered by the benefit and what arrangements, if any, are required locally. Foundation, setting, attachment, or other work should not be assumed to be included merely because VA supplies an item. Request a clear explanation of responsibility before authorizing work. Local cemetery rules should be checked directly; this page does not provide installation instructions.
If there is no grave, or something needs correcting
VA’s headstone guidance describes memorial markers for certain situations in which remains are unavailable, including remains that were not recovered, burial at sea, donation to science, and cremated remains that were scattered. These requests have their own circumstances to explain. A memorial marker is different from a marker placed over an actual burial.
If an inscription is wrong or an existing government item is damaged, VA’s instructions explain how to describe a replacement request. Avoid attempting a repair or changing an inscription while a question is unresolved. Keep the relevant correspondence with the burial records. For broader context, the guide to cemeteries and headstones explains general decisions about burial grounds and monument care.
Sources and further reading
This is general information, not medical, legal or tax advice. Rules vary by state and municipality. Check individual requirements with the relevant agency.